246: How to Get Honest with Yourself

246: How to Get Honest with Yourself

Feb 26, 2021 |

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Have you ever gone through a major life change, and then, in retrospect, wondered how you could have possibly been living the way that you were living? Everything seemed so great at the time, right? Or, at least, great enough. But when the spell is broken, and the veil is lifted - suddenly everything looks different. Hindsight is 20/20 - and one of life's biggest challenges is to see things accurately in the moment. In today's episode you'll get strategies to get past how you *wish* things were - in order to see things as they actually are.

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245: How to Not Die Alone - Using Science to Crack the Code of Modern Dating - with Logan Ury

245: How to Not Die Alone - Using Science to Crack the Code of Modern Dating - with Logan Ury

Jan 27, 2021 |

Modern dating can be so challenging. Simply finding good people is challenging. Knowing how to take a relationship to the next level, when to commit, or when to get out of a relationship so that you can find something better - that’s challenging! Today we’re going to focus on all the ways that you can get out of your own way, and use the power of behavioral science to make better choices and break old patterns as you navigate the world of modern love. Our guest is Logan Ury, author of the new book “How to Not Die Alone: The Surprising Science that Will Help You Find Love”. You’ll find that there are all sorts of ways for you to adjust what you do to make the kinds of decisions that lead to deeper, more fulfilling connections.

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244: A Practical Approach for Big Changes

244: A Practical Approach for Big Changes

Dec 20, 2020 |

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When you want to shift something in your life, sometimes the scale of the change can seem daunting. So how do you get from point A to point B (or...point Z) in a way that's actually doable - and sustainable? It can be tempting to take drastic actions to make big changes - but you might sabotage your changes by falling into your old habits. Today we'll talk about how you can create positive changes in your relationship, or something else in your life, in a way that's practical, and relatively easy - no matter how big the change.

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243: Ultimatums - The Good and The Bad

243: Ultimatums - The Good and The Bad

Dec 12, 2020 |

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50:05
Are ultimatums ever a good idea? If so - when? If not, what can you do instead? What should you do if you receive an ultimatum from your partner? And how do you undo the damage that an ultimatum can do to a relationship? In this episode, we're going to cover all the ins and outs of what to do when you come up against a dealbreaker in your relationship, and how to handle your last-ditch attempts to get things back on track.

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242: Using Creativity for Emotional Alchemy - plus a song!

242: Using Creativity for Emotional Alchemy - plus a song!

Nov 20, 2020 |

When emotions are stuck within you - how can you use your creativity to get things moving? Sometimes the muse within you is a quiet whisper - other times screaming for your attention. Today we'll talk about how to find the voice - and what to do once you have. And, towards the end, I'll share a song with you that arrived after recording my last episode, on the process of going through a breakup and grieving. (song is at [19:20])

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241: Breaking Up and Moving On - What's Normal? What's the "Right" Way?

241: Breaking Up and Moving On - What's Normal? What's the "Right" Way?

Nov 10, 2020 |

When it comes to breaking up, is there a right way to do it? How long should it take for you to get over your ex? How do you know when it's time to see someone new? How do you deal with the way that your ex is handling the breakup? In this week's episode, we're going to cover what's "normal" in the breakup experience, and how to make sure that you focus on your grieving in a way that's most likely to lead to growth - so you can avoid making the same mistakes in your next relationship.

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240: When You're in Conflict - How to Find Optimal Outcomes - with Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler

240: When You're in Conflict - How to Find Optimal Outcomes - with Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler

Oct 23, 2020 |

When you’re stuck in conflict, how do you step outside of the situation enough to identify ways to break the patterns that are keeping you stuck? Especially in ongoing conflict, just doing more of the same isn’t going to change your outcome. Our guest is Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler, author of Optimal Outcomes: Free Yourself from Conflict at Work, at Home, and in Life. We’ll talk about practical, effective strategies you can use to escape the conflict loop - and, thus, get different results!

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239: How to Avoid the Negative Bypass

239: How to Avoid the Negative Bypass

Oct 16, 2020 |

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Do you ever feel like you *should* have gotten over something challenging - that you’ve grown, and learned from the experience, but that on some level it still haunts you? Or do you feel inner conflict around decisions that seem like they should be relatively clear-cut? Are you afraid of failure? It could very well be that you have bypassed or suppressed your negative emotions, and that they’re now stuck inside you, wreaking havoc on your inner guidance system. By not facing failures or challenges head on, we actually create an emotional dissonance within ourselves that’s an obstacle to moving forward. Today we’ll talk about how to face things when they’re not quite the way you want them to be - and how to develop the inner honesty that will help you feel aligned and courageous no matter what’s happening in your life.

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238: Unmotivated Partners - What To Do? - with Pete Pearson

238: Unmotivated Partners - What To Do? - with Pete Pearson

Sep 25, 2020 |

When your partner is unmotivated to change and has resorted to stonewalling - or blaming everything on you - what can you do? If you’re a therapist working with a couple in this situation, you’ll learn some valuable ways to directly address this issue and change the dynamics. In today’s episode, we have a return visit from Peter Pearson. He is a co-founder, with Ellyn Bader, of The Couples Institute, one of the leading centers for training couples therapists and helping people find practical solutions to relationship issues.

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237: Overcoming Procrastination - Session with David Burns and Neil Sattin

237: Overcoming Procrastination - Session with David Burns and Neil Sattin

Sep 19, 2020 |

Do you ever procrastinate? If you’re looking for a way to finally stop putting things off - and get them done - then today’s episode is for you. As a follow-up to a session with me on being overwhelmed, David Burns has returned for a session to help me with my own procrastination. You’ll get to hear what works, what doesn’t, and - if you’re a therapist or coach - how to help other people with their procrastination. David Burns...

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Podcast Reviews

  • Apologies are hard…
    December 13, 2024 by kaandcoco from Canada

    Thank you for the guidance on apologies. Our Mother died recently and the family dynamics have intensified! Triggers going off for everyone. Old wounds festering. I am and know many other “un-apologizers”. It has rarely seemed safe or sincere to apologize with in our family. It’s so difficult for me to sort through apologizing when I am not ready or simply don’t feel I should or can with sincerity. I see now it can be helpful to break it up into parts where possible. So important to begin de-escalating a conflict and the hurts and resentments that can build in the time following a real or perceived slight or conflict. Hopefully enough to create a space to return to when I have a better understanding of what dynamics are in play in myself. Once de-escalated I can agree to revisiting the situation and subsequently reassure myself and others that I value coming to a resolution. Hopefully avoiding or minimizing further misunderstandings in future. Great topic! Thank you

  • So happy I found your show!
    August 30, 2024 by DvGuts from United States

    Wonderful content. Please continue - you have so much valuable, beautiful information to share!

  • !!!
    June 9, 2024 by geminilibraleo from United States

    Glad this show is back!

  • What a great listen!
    October 25, 2022 by Claribelleee from Philippines

    This show is so real and authentic! Love the chemistry of the hosts of the guests!

  • Great show!
    September 4, 2022 by Kingxxelo from United States

    I listen to this every time I'm struggling with something .